Pragmatism of Polygamous Family In Muslim Society: Beyond Islamic

: Pragmatism has become a common motive in polygamous marriages, despite ignoring the principles of Islamic law. Issues ranging from unfair treatment and dishonest attitudes towards wives to the rejection of polygamous pregnant wives have colored the attitudes of pragmatic polygamous life. This article reveals pragmatic motives that become the reasons why a woman is willing to be istri selir-sirri (concubine) in polygamy. This research uses a qualitative approach in which data was collected from observation, interviews, and library studies. The findings of this study suggest that pragmatic motives exist in polygamies, such as the husband's economic stability accompanied by lust satisfaction, the woman's needs for social-economic improvement, and the need for comfort and security. The lack of power among women in relation to men of high social and economic status causes them to agree to be the second wife (selir) despite the sirri marriage status, which is officially unregistered and sometimes unknown even to their own family. As the article sees only the pragmatic sides of polygamy, it still needs further development.


Introduction
Pragmatism has become a common motive in polygamous marriages, despite ignoring the principles of Islamic law.Islamic laws that govern various rules in a family relationship no longer become an end, but a means exploited by short-term interests.Data shows that although the polygamy rate is decreasing, from 794 in 2013 to 643 in 2016, 1 the trend of polygamous practices keeps increasing. 2 Meutia Hatta Swasono suggested that polygamous practice is confirmed more by invitation to polygamy within society disseminated through social media. 3The polygamy trend has occurred recently along with the trend of hijrah and the narrative of Islam revival in Indonesia.
So far, studies on polygamy tend to discuss three points.Firstly, polygamous studies tend to be viewed from a controversial perspective on the law behavior.It is interesting because, in reality, many attitudes and behaviors wrapped in religion are only an excuse to disguise pragmatic goals.Polygamous marriages done by a husband without the wife's knowledge or women willing to be polygamous selir-sirri wives for the sake of money and quasi-comfort without marriage registration are the pragmatic reasons for polygamy.They can ignore justice values in polygamy and women's protection.
This research used a qualitative approach in which the data was collected through observation, interviews, and library studies.The observation was conducted by observing the daily lives of polygamous families in Pekalongan.An in-depth interview was conducted with ten polygamous actors.Five people were interviewed directly, and the other five via phone and chat.A library study was carried out by reading pieces of literature according to the research topic, particularly literature talking about the pros and cons and regulations of good polygamy in religious law and state law.The literature used comes from journal articles, marriage law, Islam Law Compilation, Turost Book (Classical Islam Scholars' Opinion), and dissertations related to polygamy.Works of literature successfully collected were read and reduced by summarizing, sorting, and focusing on important points and disposing of unnecessary points according to the problem to be addressed.The collected data was then classified into data categories.After categorizing the data, it was reduced and analyzed using an interpretive analysis technique.

Pragmatism
The term pragmatism derives from the words pragma meaning action or deed, and ism meaning conception or tenet. 8Pragmatism is a philosophical school of thought changing the direction of American philosophy, with Charles Pierce, William James, and John Dewey being its founders. 9Pragmatism is also viewed as an original American philosophy. 10Pragmatism prioritizes a perspective on action that should be viewed from the point of practical effect: to achieve the objective or to solve the problem encountered by the actor.Pragmatism refers to realistic action in facing a practical situation in which theoretical guidance is not 8 Erin McKenna and Maurice Hamington, "Pragmatism," in The Oxford Handbook of Feminist Philosophy, 2021.David L. Morgan, "Pragmatism as a Basis for Grounded Theory," Qualitative Report, 2020.
9 David Sidorsky, "Pragmatism and New Directions for American Philosophy: A Turn to the Future via Commitment to Scientific Method," Filosofskii Zhurnal, 2019.
10 Siti Maslakhah, "Penerapan Metode Learning By Doing Sebagai Implementasi Filsafat Pragmatisme Dalam Mata Kuliah Linguistik Historis Komparatif," Diksi, 2019.too useful. 11Furthermore, pragmatism is a viewpoint that examines or determines whether existing truths or theories have a practical function for humans. 12he pragmatist viewpoint can be found in family life.A modern society free of religious values tends to think pragmatically, leading to a pleasure-, sexual-, and reproduction-oriented marriage. 13study found that wives with high education tend to be pragmatistic and accept the policy of limiting children.It is because they understand better the advantage of limiting the number of children.According to Zhou, Chinese wanderer ethnicities are generally pragmatic and output-oriented, which is reflected in business operations.The Chinese wanderer ethnicities generally run large businesses catering to the needs of the local ethnicities, greatly influencing the local economy.

Polygamous family
Polygamy is a marriage practice with more than two couples.Polygamy is classified into two types: polyandry (the marriage of a woman to more than one man) and polygyny (the marriage of a man to more than one woman). 14In Islam, polygamous (polygynous) marriage practice has been legitimized in Verse 3 of the Quran, Surah An-Nisaa, despite varying interpretations. 15This verse has become a theological law regulating polygamous practice in Muslim society until today.Nevertheless, polygamy is perceived differently by people, either as pros or cons. 16The perception of polygamy is inseparable from the local cultural perspective.study, for example, revealed that polygamy occurring in the Acholi community of Uganda is an ordinary practice and not considered barbaric, cruel, or unjust.
Polygamous marriage, in addition to affecting wives, also affects children.The effect of polygamy on a wife has been indicated by study in Senegal, revealing that polygamous marriage has an impact on the increase of the first wife's saving amount due to the reduced expenditure for consumptive needs, either food or non-food.Meanwhile, in the Arab Emirate Union, the wife whose husband gets married again will take two stances: filing for divorce, particularly for those still young and having a career, or staying with her husband but not happy.17Meanwhile, in relation to children, administratively unregistered polygamous marriage will lead to children's negligence. 18In addition, polygamous marriage results in mental health disorders, social problems, and decreased academic achievement among children. 19Thus, polygamous marriage has adversely affected the lives of wives and children.

Muslim society
The term "Muslim society" refers to an order of community adhering to Islam controlled by a political institution or state.Because it is under political control, Muslim society should obligatorily obey regulations and restrain them from taking actions that endanger the harmonious life of the nation. 20One of Muslim society's obligations is to ensure the safety and security of non-Muslims who live in Muslim countries. 21It is in line with view that the principle in civil society is also a part of Muslim society.In addition, the term "Muslim society" is paralleled with "ummatan wasaṭan". 22Therefore, Muslim society should have an insight into justice and moderate characteristics. 23he family, as a component of Muslim society, has faced various problems.revealed changes in gender dynamics and family relations in the Maldives as a result of globalization.In the families of Malaysian Muslim society, mediation is used to solve family problems, such as preventing disputes and even divorce.However, in the case of divorce, mediation is done to solve disputes concerning Sam'ani Sam'ani, et.al.,  DOI: 10.22373/sjhk.v7i1.15874http://jurnal.ar-raniry.ac.id/index.php/samarahthe rights to property and children's caretaking. 24Meanwhile, a Muslim family in Islamabad opposes family planning policies on the basis of social and economic reasons, positioning children, particularly boys, as a source of prestige and power.25Thus, family, as a component of Muslim society in various parts of the world, has responded to problems in varying ways.

Husband's social economic stability status
The husband's economic stability, confirmed by lust among the Muslim men who have had wives, is one of the factors causing the pragmatism in polygamy.The pragmatic polygamous process can start from the well-established men's wish to hunt for women or from the opportunity in the presence of a tempting woman willing to be a concubine (selir-sirri).It is in line with SN (52 years old), a husband constituting a rich businessman revealing that he has done polygamy many times silently (sirri).SN (52 years old) stated 43 : "A man wants to do polygamy bravely due to his economic or monetary stability, desire, and opportunity, i.e., the woman willing to be married or even the woman tempting first, because the man has a lot of money.If I ask my wife for permission, she will not give it, and this may lead to disputes.Instead of having a sexual act out of marriage, we should get married silently.It is just for fun.By using contraceptives, we can prevent our spouses from having children.I want to get married quietly and do not need status.My concubine needs money and sex only, and I will divorce the one who begins to ask for rotation, being waited for, or being socialized, as it is impossible and it will make my wife hungry.Knowing this, I admit that such polygamy cannot implement the religious rule; it just makes our relationship rightful (halal)" What SN (52 years old) has revealed indicates a pragmatism phenomenon in polygamy due to economic stability and biological satisfaction fantasy.SN (52 years old) has done polygamy with some women without telling or asking his official wife for permission because he believes that his wife will give the permit.With the excuse of religion, i.e. to avoid zina (doing sexual acts out of marriage) sin, he prefers to do polygamy silently (sirri).The status of marriage with his second marriage and so on through official registration is not necessary at all to him, even though he does not expect to get a child from his pragmatic marriage, because he does it just for fun.If his concubine (selir-sirri) begins to demand he Sam'ani Sam'ani, et.al.,  DOI: 10.22373/sjhk.v7i1.15874http://jurnal.ar-raniry.ac.id/index.php/samarahstay at her home (mabit) several times a week just like what religious precept about polygamy has taught or asks him to publish their marriage to the public, SN prefers divorcing her because it will lead to a conflict with his first wife as the one officially registered by the state (Religion Affairs Office).
WL (52 years old), having been successful in his batik production business, said similarly.He admitted that he had ever added two wives all at once without their (his wives') knowledge.In an interview conducted by the author, WL (52 years old) stated that: 26 "I did polygamy silently because I had much money and wanted satisfaction.If there is a man said that he does polygamy to help a woman, he is lying, because he actually just wants satisfaction.I have ever gotten married with other two women silently at the same time within four months.My wife and my concubines did not know that I did polygamy.Because the marriage with these two women was just for fun, when they begin to be waited for continuously or to ask for rotation, I divorced them.I could do that fairly just like what the religion has taught.Now I have no concubine.I do not have courage to do more polygamy because I do not have money as much as I did in the past.But if my economic condition has been stable and my family's need has been sufficed adequately, of course I want to do polygamy again".
What the actors of polygamy have said above is also similar to the statement of BN (56 years old), a rich businessman living in a luxurious house because his official wife lives in a different city.BN (56 years old) does polygamy bravely because of his economic stability and his wife's living in a faraway place.Thus, BN (56 years old) admitted that biologically he needs one more wife who can stay with him or at least stay in the same city to meet his sexual needs at any time.He chose a silent (sirri) marriage because he did not want his first wife to know it.BN (56 years old) said that: 27 "Economic stability is highly needed in polygamy.Polygamy can be done if a man can satisfy both his first and second wife's needs, although this second marriage is done silently (sirri).It is impossible to get a permit from the first one ".
Social-economic status stability triggering polygamy is also revealed in the author's interview with SC (70 years old).The actor of polygamy comes from a societal leader and a religious leader admitting that he has four wives.His first wife was registered officially, his second wife was unregistered, his third wife Sam'ani Sam'ani, et.al.,  DOI: 10.22373/sjhk.v7i1.15874http://jurnal.ar-raniry.ac.id/index.php/samarahwas registered officially, and his fourth wife was unregistered.Despite having four wives, SC (70 years old) lives alone at his home with no wife because his wives instead live in different houses.Furthermore, surprisingly, SC (70 years old) said that he often changes his fourth wife (getting marrieddivorce), while he still maintains his first, second, and third wives.Even his last fourth wife is still a teen (Interview on 18/3/2022).
From the various polygamous cases aforementioned, it can be seen that husbands' polygamy is often due to their stable social-economic status and excessive lust.A man's economic stability has made him subjugate a woman confidently and made a woman willing to marry him as a concubine (selir-sirri); even in this case, sometimes the woman tempts the man first.Eventually, the excuse of religion is made a factor to support polygamous behavior implemented pragmatically.

The Need for the improvement of social-economic status among women.
A woman's social-economic status will affect her availability to be a second wife (concubine).Considering SN's (52 years old) experience, the women needing social-economic status will easily accept an invitation to get married as concubines in polygamy.SN (52 years), a husband doing polygamy silently several times, stated that most women are willing to be married in polygamy because of money, despite no time to be waited for.This statement is made based on his personal experience with inviting some women to do polygamous marriages silently (sirri) (Interview on 3/4/2022).Some selir-sirri wives (concubines) admit to a woman's motive to be a polygamous concubine (selirsirri) to improve their social and economic status.MZ (52), a widow with three children who has decided to become a sirri-selir concubine, stated: 28 "At that time my parents have been so old that I need a man to meet our family's basic necessities.I need to meet the needs for food, cloth, and shelter and to improve our social status".
What MZ (52 years old) has stated indicates that the factors making a woman willing to engage in polygamy are meeting her basic needs, including food, clothing, shelter, and improving her social status all at once.MZ (52 years old) was married underhand by a rich businessman (> 60 years old) without his first wife's permit.It is in line with NS (49 years), a widow willing to be married to a batik entrepreneur who had a wife.NS (49 years) hoped that having gotten married, her husband would give her capital to run the business according to her hobby because, as a second wife married illegally or underhand (sirri), she thought that it was impossible to rely continuously on her husband, recalling that her husband had had another wife and family (Interview on 6/4/2022).
Similarly, MN (52 years), also constituting a concubine in polygamy, said that she had been left by her father since she was so young that she needed a guide and protector in her life; she had worked since she graduated from senior high school until her 31 st birthday and had not gotten married until that age.During the interview, MN (52 years) said: 29 "I am willing to engage in polygamy because I should meet my life's needs.I believe that although he has had a wife and a family, my current husband able to satisfy my needs and improve my standard of life.If he does not have a stable economic status, I would not want to be married.Although I am a second wife, I was married legally through the first wife's and the religion court's permits.Thus, I get my share justly and proportionally" This statement confirms that the motive to improve social-economic status is why a woman is willing to be a second wife in polygamy.This reason is even recognized by a man doing polygamy, BN (56 years old), about his second wife, P (26 years old), who was still a virgin when he married her illegally.When she was asked why she was willing to be married illegally at such a young age, BN (56 years old) replied: 30 "The main factor is surely her perspective to choose a man with a more stable life compared with her peers.It means that the man will be more accountable.She prefers the older man to her peers because no man her age can live up to her standards.BN's (56 years old) statement based on her personal experience also indicates that the husband's economic stability is more important for a woman to improve her social-economic status than age equality and even the marriage status itself.In this case, a young girl, SL (28 years old), is found to admit that she is willing to be a pragmatic polygamous wife with secret marriage, the status of which should be hidden from others.SL (28 years old) stated firmly: 31 "I need neither existence nor marital status.I just need money to meet my monthly needs, at least as much as my salary to support my economic needs, as I have so many needs" SL's statement confirms that many women prefer pragmatic polygamous marriage with a well-established man who has had another wife, despite his old age, to marriage with a single man of the same age and less-stable social and economic status, because of the pragmatic objective of improving social and economic status.

Woman's needs for comfort and security
The woman's need for comfort and security contributes to the case of pragmatic polygamy.A woman, particularly a widow, sometimes feels more comfortable and expects protection from her second marriage, despite an illegal polygamous marriage.It can even be a way for a woman to avoid temptation and violence, physically or psychically.It is in line with the statement of AH (50 years old), a widow who is willing to marry a man with another wife illegally.She admitted that she entered into this polygamous marriage not merely for an economic motive but because she was an employee with an income.AH (50 years old) has done polygamous marriage pragmatically without his husband's first wife for security and comfort reasons related to her heart and environment, in addition to finding the one with whom she can share anything about her life problems.AH (50 years old) stated: 32 "Since I became a widow, many men tempted me through chatting, even though there was a State Civil Apparatus often following me when I walked alone; as a normal woman with sexual needs, I worried that I would be tempted with seduction.Finally, I thought of finding a man to bind me to make me more composed.Why did I choose underhand (sirri) polygamy?I should stay in this house with my elderly mother-in-law from my previous husband, and I should take care of her, so it is impossible for me to leave this house.If I married a single man, he would ask me to live with him in his house.In the case of polygamy, my husband continues to live with his first wife.I do not take much time to take care of him.Even sirri (underhand) polygamy is more acceptable to the people in my neighborhood.I think my status as a second wife is more composed and safer than my status as a widow within society" (interview on 21/3/2022).
In line with NS (49 years old) 34 , PH (40 years old) said 35 : "With widow status, we cannot go anywhere freely because people will gossip about us when we go out of our home at night.One day, we went back home at night to pick up our nephew.At that time, I was with my brother.Someone spied on us for a long time and waited for us to get out of the car.They perhaps guessed who was with us.They have a negative stigma against widows.That was not comfortable.Therefore, I am willing to be married, even in underhanded polygamy, to find comfort and avoid gossip.Despite no official registration, people know I have gotten married legally in the religious system" NS' (49 years old) and PH's (40 years old) statements above confirm that the social system accepts more second wives despite underhand marriages than a widow, and they will see her negatively when she goes out at night.Although the state has not yet recognized unregistered "polygamy," people have been able to accept the legality of marriage so that women have been able to feel comfortable within society.
Similarly, MZ (52 years old) also stated firmly36 : "I need protection from a husband figure to protect me because I feel uncomfortable (people always see me suspiciously) and shy about being a widow.I am willing and accepting to be married in polygamy, despite my husband's absence beside me, for he should go to other wives.Importantly, communication keeps working" (Interview on 24/3/2022).This MZ's (52 years old) statement, just like the previous women's statement, indicates a woman's need for comfort within a society in which the status of the widow will lead to discomfort due to her actions that always become the focus of people's attention.For this reason, a widow is often willing to be the second wife of an underhand (sirri) or pragmatic polygamous husband for comfort and safety in all of her activities.

Macro and micro dimensions of woman married in polygamy
Polygamous marriage is due primarily to the social and economic conditions of both men and women. 37From the men's side, husbands with economic stability tend to do pragmatic polygamy bravely just for fun moreover, those with wives living in different places, as shown in the result section.When an individual's needs have been met in the presence of stability, there is a predisposition to meet other higher wishes or needs, such as polygamy.In this context, religion (Islam) frequently serves as a justification to smooth the satisfaction of desire.In the context of needs, Maslow 38 states that a human being should first satisfy their lowest need, then the next highest one, and the highest one in order to actualize themselves.It means that those who have been able to meet their basic needs tend to want to meet their higher needs.An individual with stable economic status wants to get married.The one who has married and has a more stable economic status usually want to engage in polygamy.This hierarchy of needs, confirmed by Maslow, is one of the factors triggering a man to do polygamy and a woman to be willing to engage in polygamy.
From a woman's perspective, the willingness to be a second, a third, or a fourth wife in a polygamous marriage is also due to the condition of her macro and micro social and economic status.In the context of Indonesia, a widow in social life is vulnerable to gossip and negative stigma, and even declination socially by other women when she is considered to tempt their husband.The macro social system may not "accept widows" and discourage polygamy within society, or at least is still tolerant of pragmatic polygamy.It means that a woman's life as a second wife is more acceptable to the public than that of a widower.In other words, being a second woman is more common within society than having widow status.A widow tends to be affected by symbolic violence 39 committed by either men or women.
In addition to the macro factor, another factor contributing to the event of polygamy is the micro factor coming from a woman, including economic pragmatic needs and protection and security needs.Many women struggle to meet their basic needs and/or self-and family needs, so they are willing to marry to a Sam'ani Sam'ani, et.al.,  DOI: 10.22373/sjhk.v7i1.15874http://jurnal.ar-raniry.ac.id/index.php/samarahman with a wife in order to improve their social and economic status, without considering the conflict and friction that may arise as a result of the polygamous marriage, particularly with the first wife.Many of them are even willing to be the second wife without the first wife's knowledge at all.It is similar to women, who need self-protection and security.A single woman, either a widow or a spinster, is very vulnerable to assault or abuse by men, either physically or psychologically. 40he pragmatic reasons for economic stability and security, as mentioned in the result section, indicate that polygamy can be a solution for a single woman finding no single man to meet her economic, protection, and security needs.Nonetheless, the expectation can be ironic because pragmatic rationales in polygamy, whether from the husband or the can disregard legal convention, either state law (positive law) or religious law (Islam fiqh).Pragmatic polygamy, as shown in the cases above, is not registered officially with the religious affairs office (Indonesian: Kantor Urusan Agama, thereafter called KUA).Therefore, it is not recognized by the state.It is, in addition to because of its objective to have funds (married and divorced), because they find difficulty in meeting the preconditions of registration when the marriage is done without the first wife's permission and knowledge.Thus, surely it cannot be registered.In Indonesian Muslim society, both monogamy and polygamy marriage registrations are regulated by Marriage Law No. 1 of 1974, amended by Law No. 16 of 2019 about the Amendment to Law Number 1 of 1974 about Marriage.Article 4 of the Law states that a man who wants to marry more than one woman should file an application to the local court, and then Article 5 states that to file an application to the court, the wife or wife's approval is required.These preconditions are also included in the Islamic Law Compilation (Indonesian: Kompilasi Hukum Islam, thereafter called KHI), exactly in Articles 56 and 58.An unregistered marriage will, in turn, affect the legal protection of women.In contrast to pragmatic polygamy, the polygamy undertaken by MN (52 years old), as aforementioned, can be registered and get equal treatment proportionally because it got permission from the first wife and the Religion Court.Such polygamy is intended to build a family with wives rather than for pragmatic reasons.
From the standpoint of religious law, particularly maqasid syariah (the goal of sharia marriage), pragmatic polygamous marriage frequently disregards religious rules, from its wedding process, which is done silently without the knowledge of family or even more entitled guardians, to rights and obligations reading of which is biased patriarchy 43 .In polygamous marriages there is a lot of neglect of human rights that should be obtained by a wife and children in the family.What then often arises is the existence of hostility between the families of the wives in polygamous marriages.The reality is that there are many cases of polygamy that trigger other forms of domestic violence (KDRT), including physical, psychological, sexual and economic violence and so on experienced by women and children.This is proof that there should be a review and reconsideration of the practice of polygamous marriages 44 .This study is different from that women engaging in polygamy and the reasons underlying it.The research we conducted instead revealed the men's social-economic stability status and the women's need for social-economic status, and the issue of women's comfort and security becoming pragmatic motives, making women available to be wives in polygamy.Pragmatic motives originally intended to get religious legality to avoid sexual acts out of marriage (zina) are entrapped in the ignorance of religious rules.
Considering the result of research showing some pragmatic reasons for women's motivation to engage in polygamy, some strategies are required to make women aware of polygamy.This action or recommendation is important to show that, firstly, a woman should be an independent person in terms of social, education, social relations, access, and good public space.Thus, the position of women socially still below the wedding age will not occur.Secondly, viewed from the economic aspect, a woman should have a job in order to be independent and to have a strong economic status.Thus, she will not be vulnerable to various forms of discrimination and symbolic violence.Thirdly, if we will undertake polygamy because Islam allows it, it should not only be intended for pragmatic purposes but also consider religious and state rules, from the process of getting the previous wife's permit and court's permit, and to the process of publishing within society, in order to get proportional equality and legal protection.

Conclusion
This study concludes that the motive of men's and women's polygamous practices is not merely based on religious doctrine; ironically, the practices ignore religious doctrine.It is pragmatism that becomes the main reason for a man to do polygamy and a woman to be available to be a polygamous wife.No bargaining Sam'ani Sam'ani, et.al.,  DOI: 10.22373/sjhk.v7i1.15874http://jurnal.ar-raniry.ac.id/index.php/samarahpower a woman has before her prospective husband with high social and economic status has made her vulnerably agree to be istri selir-sirri (concubine) in polygamy.This article concludes that the motives of pragmatic polygamy are: first, the husband's economic stability; second, the women's need for improving social-economic status; and third, the women's need for comfort and security.
As the current study sees only the pragmatic sides of polygamy, it still needs further development.One of the issues that can be researched further is the psychological review of children born into polygamous families.The psychology of children born from polygamous family traditions needs to be studied because existing studies only look at the legal and caretaking patterns of children born from polygamous families. .